peer review worksheet

1.No topic sentence in the first paragraph. But it has a general conclusion about the whole story " Alice in Wonderland". The first,  I think I need to want down the topic sentence about what I  am going  to talk in the essay.
2. The thesis statement in my essay is about how Alice's behavior connect to the defence mechanism. But I think I didn't introduce this well. I need to write down a few sentences about my thesis to tell everyone what's going on my essay.
3. I did organize the main idea of each paragraph. But the main idea isn's in the first sentence of each paragraph. The main concept from the second paragraph could be explored by everyone. And also the paragraph make a relevant point. The main conclusion is not strong enough and not clear not everyone to see.
4.It has some grammar, spelling mistake in the essay. I think punctuation is good. I quote everything I need to quote in the essay.
5. I think the first resourse, it's good enough to explain the idea. But the second one, it's not really good. I mean the resourse is good, but I am not organize it well.
6.  The strusture clear is the greatest strength in paper. And the conclusion in the last paragraph is good in organizing.

first draft

The psychology of Alice in Wonderland

Alice in Wonderland is a wonderful story I had even seen. The whole story is so magical. And every chapter has a special little story talks about what happen in the wonderland for Alice. Alice see many unbelievable things in the wonderland. Like she can have a conversation with the animals and the food there can make her body size become bigger than before or smaller. The whole story has a obvious thing, Alice has vary self-conversations. As we known, no matter what Alice saw in wonderland is her dream. Her unconscious mind through her dream to express her deepest feeling. So the whole strong is easy to connect to the psychology.

In the story, she really like to talk to herself. When her faced everything make her feel upset, she would comfort herself. In some aspect, we can consider her  behavior relate to defense mechanism in psychology. In Freudian psychoanalytic theory, defense mechanisms are unconscious psychological strategies brought into play by various entities to cope with reality and to maintain self-image. Freud proposed that the ego protects itself with defence machanism-tactics that reduce or redirect anxiety by distorting reality. But in 1977, George Eman Vaillant categorization, defenses form a continuum related to their psychoanalytical developmental in 4 levels.

In chapter one, Alice first down in the rabbit hole. She drank the drink in the table and she become smaller than before. Then she want to go into the garden but she found out she left the key in the table. She was smaller now and she can’t get the key from the table. So she began to cry. But soon, she told herself there’s no use for crying and she should leave it off this miunte. From this her behavior, we can know that Alice is try to keep her nagative feeling under her mind and let the positive feeling come out.  This is repression in denfese mechanism. She don’t want the nagetive feeling to bother her  and this feeling if exsist in her mind will make her feel unhappy. So she choose to oppress her feeling and tell herself to let it go.

Also follow this conversation, the book mention, “Alice sometime scolded herself so severely as to bring the tears into her eyes. And once she trying her own ears for having cheated herself in a gameof croqest she was playing against herself, for this curious child was very fond of pretending to be two peaple. “ From this few sentense, you can analyse Alice was imagine herslf playing the two person croquest game and she want to through this to express her bad feeling. And crying is the best way for her to give vent to her feeling. This is fantasy in denfence mechanism. Fantasy  means people try to imagine something that is not exist  and they want to through the imagination to slove the inner and outer conflicts.

Finally, we can figure out there are so many different ways when people fece their nagetive feeling  in their life. And they will have different reaction to protect themslves and hide their nagetive feeling in their unconscious mind. But they are not really forget this negative feelling. Alice’s behavior is a good expression for the defence mechanism.From the beginning she down to the rabbit hole  until the end she wake up from everthing she saw in wonderland become a pack of card. She have  a lot of different experience in wonderland and she face a lot of touble too. And she through different defence to help herself to go through each of them.

plan-psychology of alice in wonderland

I feel a little bit hard for me find the relationship between the psychology and alice in wonderland. I have almost finish reading this book. But it's kind like I fotgot the detail in the book very soon and I am not really interested in this book. Today, Pro. gave us vary psychology phrase relate to alice in wonderland. But it's too much for me to choose. It seem like each one can fix the book, but I didn't find something to prove it. But right now, I got some idea. I don't know good or not, but I try to make sense of it. I will start my paper on 3 area: dream- concious- unconcious. I think this 3 area has connection of each other. So I think it will be easy for me to start it. Hopefully, I can find the evidence tomorrow to prove my idea.

Alice in wonderland( chapter 1 & chapter 2)

I have read chapter 1 and chapter 2 in" Alice in wonderland". That's a really funny thing I have even seen. It's a funny story too. I think the story is so magical. Something is I never imagine in the real world before. Like the book in chapter1 mention about Alice was felt in the rabbit hole and she found out there was a bottle of drink that made her shrink. And later she found out the cake on the table and she ate it, the cake made her bacame super bigger. And another interesting is that the animal can talk to Alice. That is a hard thing for me to believe that is ture. And this, I think it can proof that Alice not in the real world. She's in her dream.

about me

I am a Chinese and I live in brooklyn. I have been NY just over one year, so everything in NY  still so interested for me. Because I am the freshman here, my english not really good. I  try to adjust the live in here, but sometime still be too hard for me. I like math course here and it's so easy for me to get A grade. I am taking the ENG class right now. I know if I really want to get the good gade, I have to work hard on it. Everyone here seems so nice here. I like cooking  in my house and I just know how to cook Chineses Food. But now I try to cook others and in recently I really like to make the Japanese Food. lol... I want to get the bacholor degree in the future, but what I want to be I still not determined it. Because some major I want to choose it but sometine I begin to lose the interest in it. And some major seems to difficult for me. At the end, I always suck in here. I love quite place and I enjoy one person just sitting in the conner. I feel that comfortable and relax at that monent. I like be alone, so I can do anything I like. That's a freedom for me. And I like listen music, too. But I don't like some music style, like hip-hop. That's too noise for me. The most ativity I like it's dance. I know a little bit ballet and all I know it's chinese tradition dance. I learned dance when I was a child. Dancing, it's a good way for my bad feeling to come out and make me feel relax.

hi,everyone

Hi,everyone:
   I just set up my blogger. I hope I can share anything with you in the blog.